They say love is kind, patient, not self-seeking, dishonor others and more. However, for some people, it is pain. Pain comes in two types- physical and emotional. Physical pain can be eased in just a day, weeks or months but emotional pain can last for even forever. Emotional pain is also more devastating.
There are couples who are happily in love with each other or contented with their relationships, spending almost all of their time together. People who are happy in their relationship are the ones who can manage their emotions and somewhat never experience any abuse either physically or emotionally.
Emotional abuse happens when a person receives consistent offenses verbally. Bullying, threats, judgments, degrading, coercion, and manipulation are some of the reasons why emotional abuse keeps on happening today. It is hard to identify whether you are in an emotionally abusive relationship or not because this kind of abuse is hard to recognize and may take time before you realize that you are suffering from an emotionally abusive relationship.
1. When motivation becomes dissuasion
When you are with your partner or loved ones, they always encourage you to do more in order to achieve your goals in life. They are always present to support you. However, when their way of motivating you starts to deter you, it only means that you are being abused emotionally. In addition, they will give side comments or criticisms that are painful to hear which will stop you from doing and grabbing all the opportunities that come your way.
2. When the people you love embarrass you in front of many people
When you are in a happy relationship, people who matter to you will never put you to shame especially in front of others. But when people who are close to you put you to shame and never care if they are surrounded with lots of people, then you should be careful because this is a clear sign you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship. What matters to them is that they make your feel embarrassed.
3. When you start to feel threatened
There are times that with a simple misunderstanding, everything escalates in an instant that leads people to start threatening you and they will even do it to the people you love. When your partner starts to threaten you by harming your family and mostly yourself, you are indeed in an emotionally abusive relationship.
4. When you are belittled
If you are happy in your relationship, your partner, family or friends will never call you names that will hurt your feelings. They will always say your name in a gentle manner. However, when you are named in an offensive way, you should assess your relationship. Belittling you is a clear sign you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship.
5. When you are always guilty even if it is not your fault
There are situations when your partner or loved ones will quarrel you because of something that you have done wrong. Of course, you will feel guilty. However, when the fault is not yours, but your family, friends or lover always put the guilt on you and will always let you feel that way, they are slowly abusing you emotionally. When it happens, you will always feel that all the things that are happening around you are all your fault.
6. When you are manipulated
If you are in a happy and abuse-free relationship, you can freely do everything that you want because your partner and others trust you and they know that you will never do anything wrong. Nevertheless, when your partner starts to manipulate you then you should be wary as this is a definite signs you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship. Every move you make must be seen and whenever you need to go somewhere, you need to seek for his or her approval and you must tell who will accompany you. In addition, when it comes to decision making, your partner is the one who makes almost all the decisions and does not consult you.
7. When you always feel neglected
Feeling neglected is another sign you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship. In every happy relationship, the partner will never abandon his other half especially when she is going through tough times. However, in an emotionally abusive relationship, your partner will become aloof and will never be there whenever you need him. He will abandon you and will not sympathize with you so that you will feel afraid.
8. When you are being left out
When you are in a happy relationship, your partner makes sure that you are never out of place and introduce you to his friends. However, in an emotionally abusive relationship, you are always being left out. Your partner or loved ones will just leave you in one corner and they will go on about their business as if you do not exist.
Being in a relationship will always be a blessing because you know that there are people who can always keep up with you through thick and thin. However, if you experience any of these signs, it only proves that you are not happy and enjoying your relationship. Instead, you are struggling hard because of the people whom you have connections with. It is not good to be in an abusive relationship especially if emotions are at stake because it can lead to extreme results that you never thought you could do to yourself.